Ed Column: Should filial piety be legislated?

“Yes.” - was the unanimous answer that echoed firmly from my group.

We find this necessary as Singapore is living in a time where everything is like a bed roses. Children are growing up with silver spoons in their mouths, spoilt and pampered like kings and queens of the household; therefore they would not know how to deal with hardships like taking care of their parents needs. What’s more, the children will be more self-centred with their own families’ well-being than their parents and soon will see them as nothing but burdens.

This, of course, is not based on concrete evidence but just assumptions. If so, then why is there a trend of the abandonment of elderly parents? With filial piety legislated, we all can rest our minds that these old and frail parents are well taken care of. Or are they?

Filial Piety is subjective.

The recent Parents Act will only take action on children who refuse to support their elderly parents financially. To some, by ‘forcing’ children to ensure that their elderly parents are provided with 3 meals daily and a roof over their heads, is a true portrayal of filial piety. To us? No.

We strongly disagree that with just being a financial support to elderly parents is an act of filial piety. Yes, the basic, tangible needs are met; but what about the emotional needs? The warmth and love from their children? A talk, a hug or a peck on a cheek? How is just ‘discarding’ elderly parents in nursing homes without making any contact with, an act of filial piety?

Some say that filial piety has to be earned. ‘Do to others what you would have them do to you” - treat your parents the way they have treated you. Therefore, if a child was abused by parents from young, the child should do the same to them when they are old. An eye of an eye, a tooth for a tooth.

What ever happened to unconditional love?

“I believe we must try to forgive our parents’ fault and mistakes. That would be the greatest demonstration of filial piety” quoted by Patrick Lee Song Juan, from the July 17’s issue of The Straits Times on the topic of filial piety.

It is yet another unanimous agreement from the all 4 of us after reading this quote. Abandonment is not the approach one should take to appease a grudge against their parents’ wrongdoings in the past. It is a wrong and immature thing to do and is never the way out.

So back to the question, should filial piety is legislated? Yes, if it ensures that all elderly parents are taken care of; but it is still not the true meaning what filial piety is all about.

Elliot.L